Rarely does the UFC put on a freak show fight, but this Saturday they’re going against the norm. For the first time in UFC history a world champion boxer, James Toney, will be taking on an MMA legend in Randy Couture.

In a strange way, this is the UFC getting back to it’s roots. Two styles going against one another to see which is the best. Only, instead of it being a boxer vs a wrestler, it’s closer to a boxer vs an MMA stylist.

This is a fight that, at first seemed like a terrible fight for Toney, but the more I think about it, the more I wonder just how much damage just one of his punches can do. Odds are, we won’t find out, but it is still a very real possibility. I may be trying to make this fight more exciting than it probably will be, but as they say, the fights all start standing and anyone has a punchers chance.

To cap the whole thing off, the UFC light weight title will be defended in a rematch from a few months ago. BJ Penn lost a close fight which cost him his belt, but he’s motivated to get it back. A motivated BJ Penn is one of the most exciting fighters you will ever see.

I can not wait for this one.

Frankie Edgar vs BJ Penn

Steve: The rematch.  Edgar is a great fighter, it is obvious.  He has a style that gives BJ troubles.  But I guarantee BJ will not take him lightly this time.  And, I trust that he will come back stronger than ever.  BJ Penn, 4^th submission.

Josh: I don’t know if I will ever root against BJ Penn. When this man is on, he’s the best fighter in the world. He’s had a few lack luster showings, but he usually comes back stronger, faster and meaner. BJ Penn by 2^nd round KO.

Randy Couture vs James Toney

Josh: This is a bizarre match. If I were in Vegas, I’d put a couple hundred down on Toney on the off chance he wins. There’s a reason he’s a 5-1 underdog. If he plays it smart, which I don’t doubt he will, Randy Couture by submission in the 2^nd.

Steve: This is a joke.  It really comes down to how long Coutrue wants to play with him, or if Toney can get lucky and get a quick shot in.  I have to go with Couture, 1^st submission.

Demian Maia vs Mario Miranda

Steve: I have always felt that Maia was over-rated.  Miranda is a better striker than him, and he won’t be foolish enough to get on the mat with him.  Miranda, 2^nd KO.

Josh: Interesting. It looks like Miranda has a big chance here, but I’m going to give the edge to Maia because of his slick submission game. If he actually uses it, Maia by submission in the 1^st.

Kenny Florian vs Gray Maynard

Josh: Florian is one of the most improved fighters in the UFC. He’s a beast and is constantly getting more aggressive  in finishing his fights. Florian by cut stoppage in the 3^rd.

Steve: This one intrigues me.  Maynard is bigger and stronger and undefeated.  Kenny has lost to superior wrestler Sean Sherk, but it was a while ago.  I think Kenny’s active guard will be Maynard’s kryptonite and it will be his first finish.  Florian, 3^rd submission.

Nate Diaz vs Marcus Davis

Steve: Another tough fight and I love it.  Davis is a great fighter, prone to cuts and bleeding.  Diaz is lanky and a great submission guy, but he loves to stand and bang.  If Davis can find an opening, he can make this happen.  Davis, decision.

Josh: Davis is an exciting fighter and he’s in Boston, which should provide extra motivation, but I don’t see him clawing his way to the top. Diaz by submission in the 3^rd.

Joe Lauzon vs Gabe Ruediger

Josh: Lauzon has a great ground game and a ton of heart. He’s someone I pick often and will again. Lauzon with a 1^st round submission.

Steve: Lauzon is a solid gatekeeper and Ruediger is the chump who couldn’t make weight on TUF.  I know he is going to try to make his best showing seeing that he made it back to the big show, but I don’t believe it will be enough.  Lauzon 1^st round submission.

Andre Winner vs Nik Lentz

Steve: I liked Winner on TUF and I have never been too impressed with Lentz.  So… Winner by decision.

Josh: I’ll go with Steve on this one. Winner by decision.

Dan Miller vs John Salter

Josh: The Millers are tough guys and always work hard. Dan Miller by 1^st round submission.

Steve: Salter’s win against MacDonald was a freak occurrence and Dan really needs the win.  Miller is a superior wrestler and should be able to ground and pound out a victory.  Miller, 2^nd KO.

Nick Osipczak vs Greg Soto

Steve: I really don’t know either of these guys well enough to make an educated guess, so I am left with simply MMA math.  Osipczak beat Matt Riddle, and Riddle beat Soto… so one has to assume, Osipczak, decision.

Josh: No real solid reason for this pick, but I’ll go with Osipczak by 1^st round submission.

Mike Pierce vs Amilcar Alves

Josh: I’ll give the first round finisher the nod, but it’ll take him a bit longer due to this being his debut in the Octagon. Alves with a submission in the 2^nd.

Steve: Alves is a highly touted first round finisher making his octagon debut.  Pierce has had middling success leaving it in the judges hands.  I have to take a chance on the untested Alves with a first round submission.

I was choked out for the first time in Jiu-Jitsu this week. I’ve been asked a few times what it was like and what happened, so I suppose it makes an interesting story.

“Rolling” is what they call sparring in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Monday night, I was rolling with my instructor, George Yulee. He had been working on using his uniform as a weapon all night and at this particular time, he had the lapel of his jacket wrapped around my neck. It was tight, but I wasn’t ready to tap.

“Are you stupid? Just tap.”

A couple years ago I was training at The Edge in Pennsylvania and that’s where I ran into the toughest person I’d rolled with. He wasn’t just tough in his skill set, but he was mentally tough. What really stuck out to me was when I’d have him in a choke. He’s gurgle, snort and gag, but he wouldn’t give up. He was going to find a way out.

From my perspective, it was demoralizing. He sounded as if he were going to die, I knew I’d have him in check mate, but he wouldn’t give up. After a little time, my grip or my arms would burn out and he’d escape. I started doing the same thing. Just hang in, stay patient and you’ll probably find a way out.

George’s choke was in good, but I thought I had room. I was trying to find a way out. When I posted my hand on his hip to scoot out, it must have felt week because he asked if I’d tapped.

“No, keep going.”

The choke got tighter.

“Okay, now I’m done.”

The next thing I know, I thought I was waking up in bed, thinking about what things I wanted to get done that day. Then I realized I didn’t remember going home. How did I get home?

My vision and hearing were like I was riding on the end of a giant springy door stopper that a little boy had just flicked.

“Am I drunk or something?”

As the blurring came slowly came to a stop and the buzzing in my ears faded I saw George kneeling over me.

“Josh. Josh, are you okay? Josh.”

It all came together what had happened. With my attitude about finding a way out, being choked unconscious had to happen eventually, and really, it was kind of cool.

Due to the Texas Hell Trip, this is in a bit late, but I don’t want to miss putting the picks in. This is a huge card and I’ve got to find a sports bar that will be showing it.

I won’t say much more, but judging by the trash talked in the press conference yesterday, this thing is exciting simply because of the tension between the two main even fighters.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Chael Sonnen is probably the best trash talker in MMA:

Anderson Silva vs Chael Sonnen

Steve: It isn’t hard to pick a winner… Anderson, by whatever he wants.  But that is the problem.  He often screws around with people who disrespect him.  If Chael brings it like he claims he will, it should be a quick finish for him.  I figure Anderson 2^nd RD KO.

Josh: The smart money is on Anderson Silva. I’ll have to put mine there as well. Chael is in great shape and probably has the type of style that could beat Silva. Unfortunately, I think he may have over-motivated Anderson with by running his mouth. Silva by KO in the 1^st.

Jon Fitch vs Thiago Alves

Josh: Thiago Alves is one of my favorite fighters. I hope the weight cutting issues haven’t hurt him because if not, I’m expecting a 2^nd round KO for the Thiago.

Steve: These two should be tied for 2^nd place in the welter-weight division.  However, Alves has something that Fitch does not… finishing power.  He also probably has ring rust, since he hasn’t fought since GSP punished him for 5 rounds last year.  But an in shape Alves destroys an in shape Fitch.  Lets go Alves, decision.

Clay Guida vs Rafael Dos Anjos

Steve: Guida is ultra popular in the UFC, but he has lost his last couple fights.  He needs to justify his name on the roster, and I think he knows that.  Dos Anjos is no gimmee though… it will be a battle.  Just the way he likes it.  Guida 3^rd KO.

Josh: I say Guida sets the pace on high and keeps it there till he comes out with the decision.

Matt Hughes vs Ricardo Almeida

Josh: Something about Almeida has earned him my support. I don’t know what, but he’s definitely been a guy that hasn’t let me down. Almeida by 3^rd round Submission.

Steve: 5 years ago, Hughes takes this easy.  Hughes has gotten real old in the last two years, though, and Almeida is seeking vengeance.  I go Almeida 2^nd sub.

Roy Nelson vs Junior Dos Santos

Steve: Roy asked for a top ten opponent… he is gonna regret it.  Dos Santos, 2^nd KO.

Josh: I’m going to go against conventional MMA bandwagoning and pick Roy Nelson to take this by TKO stoppage in the 2^nd.

Dustin Hazelett vs Rick Story

Josh: Hazelett by 1^st round submission.

Steve: I like both these guys.  Hazelett has him with experience and a killer ground game.  Rick is a tough opponent and won’t go lightly, so it could be a fight of the night.  Hazelett 2nd submission.

Phil Davis vs Rodney Wallace

Steve: Black on black crime!  When in doubt, I try to go with the undefeated one.  I will go with Davis, 2^nd KO.

Josh: I’ll take Davis by 2^nd round KO as well.

Tim Boetsch vs Todd Brown

Josh: All right, fine, I’ll pick Tim Boetsch. I’ll even give him the KO in the 2^nd.

Steve: Boetsch has had some success in the UFC, and Brown is a newbie who hasn’t fought anyone of any significance.  I am not sure which way to go, but I will go with the guy who has fought in the big leagues.  Boetsch, decision.

Johny Hendricks vs Charlie Brenneman

Steve: This one is tough to call, but I am going with my undefeated rule again.  Hendricks, 3^rd KO.

Josh: Okay, I know we’ve agreed on almost every pick and I know it’s annoying, but I’ll do it again anyway. I like Hendricks by decision.

Struve vs Morecraft

Josh: Struve is difficult to deal with. Any Jiu Jitsu fighter with long limbs is dangerous, and being a sky scraper, it’s not hard to say Struve by 1^st round submission.

Steve: Struve is the future of the heavyweight division, maybe always a gate keeper, but he gets better and better.  He is nearly 7 feet tall and hard to deal with.  Struve, 2nd submission.

Ben Saunders vs Dennis Hallman

Steve: Hallman was once a pretty spectacular guy who finished Matt Hughes twice, once in 20 seconds.  However, 80 fights has their toll.  Saunders and his killer knees smash out a 1^st KO.

Josh: Ben Saunders really impressed me when he went the distance with John Fitch on short notice. He’s a tough guy who’s on his way up meeting a guy who’s on the back end of his career. Saunders by KO in the 1^st.

Every year about this time, my Mom takes a trip to Texas to visit relatives and she drags along as much support as she can. Typically I resist the idea and I get met with “This could be the last time you see…”  Of course, that stopped working a long time ago when my Great Grandmother’s milage counter clicked over a hundred. Twenty five years of “last visits” kinda gets you doubting.

I thought I was in the clear this year. We have a 3 month old now and a 3 year old and that’s a travel night mare. Couple that with my wife’s desire to avoid planes as much as possible, and I’ve got a slam dunk “Sorry, we’d love to go, but we can’t. Maybe next time.”

Then somebody suggested an RV. To my dismay, my wife loved the idea. So, starting today, my wife, my 3 year old, my 3 month old, my 2 year old niece, my brother, my mom and I will be cramming into an RV and steering it towards Texas in what I’ve affectionately called “The Texas Hell Trip”. I’m calling it that because, well, I’m optimistic.

I don’t know why I agreed to this. I’m sure at some point I’ll be wondering if “I jump out of the RV moving at 65, will I be killed instantly or be horribly maimed yet survive?”

To avoid that, I will be using Twitter/Facebook updates as small pressure valves to help keep my sanity.

I can’t count how many times people would come to the booth asking if the copies of Arsenic Lullaby or the T-shirts were free. The response was always the same.

“No, they’re better than free. They’re worth money.”

Typically we’d just get a look and they’d walk off. What they didn’t consider was we were right.

First, let’s get one thing straight, at a place like Comic Con, free stuff sucks.

Sure, they spent all day going from booth to booth grabbing up and filling their giant free Comic Con bags with free stuff all day long. Buttons, stickers, fliers, and other promotional crap that, once you get home, you’ll just throw away anyway.

Now, if they actually spent $10 for one book, $15 for two, or if you get both books and the DVD you can have it for an even $20 (sorry, went into pitch mode), you’ll more than likely read and watch the damn things attentively because you spent money on them. That is why you won’t get anything free from Arsenic Lullaby.

Another thing that baffled me was how people don’t consider what their time is worth. Fox rented out a restaurant to promote their new animated series “Bob’s Burgers” and as part of the promotion, they were giving out a free burger and soda to everyone who wanted one. You just had to wait in line to get it.

I was hungry, why not? I looked at the line, it’d take me an hour to get thru the damned thing. I just walked away because I, unlike the last person in that line, considered what my time was worth.

Clearly the only for one day Bob’s Burgers wasn’t giving out the best burger on the planet. At best, it was high school cafeteria quality. Now, I could get that in the convention center. Sure it’d cost me about $10 for a garbage burger and a soda, but is it worth $10 for me to sacrifice an hour of my day standing between some sweaty smelly Storm Trooper and a guy who won’t shut up about how Batman could outsmart Superman? NO!

The same is true for standing in line for any amount of time for the autographs of the cast of Glee. What’s that worth? A boring story about how you waited in line for Molly Shannon’s autograph? You suck!

Folks, keep in mind, whether you’re waiting for a free sandwich or driving to every gas station around looking the cheapest gallon, your time is worth something. Don’t piss it away.

Most of the booths started the Con like this: Lay out a nice table cloth. Stack every single book, print and flier you’ve ever had printed into giant stacks. Set up a huge banner to draw attention. Rig up lights to highlight said banner. Sit on your ass and wait for the excited customers.

They then ended the con like this: Pack up every single thing they brought not having sold a thing.

Then there was the Arsenic Lullaby booth. Doug, the brain behind the book is a fantastic salesman. He sets the scene in a way that looks haphazard but also has a purpose. He doesn’t pile all of his merchandise up to look as if his entire inventory is available. Instead, it’s small stacks that say “People want this stuff and it’s hard to keep on the table.”

Next, we don’t sit. We’re on our feet and we bark people over.

To anyone who passes, “Hey, how’s it going?”

OH, they looked, now they’re roped into the sales pitch.”

Put the book in their hand. Tell them to read this page. When they laugh, throw another page in their face. They laugh again, throw the rest of the pitch at them.

“We have a show special, one book for $10 or two for $15 and while the twisted genius behind it all is here, he’ll sign and put a little sketch in it for ya.”

You don’t get everyone to buy, but if you don’t make the effort, as we’ve seen earlier, you don’t move anything.

I can’t imagine what it looks like from the perspective from the first exhibitor’s perspective. There they were, with all this slick shit and no one’s stopping, let alone buying anything. The entire time they’re watching us, making asses of ourselves and leaving with way less inventory.

The best part, all of this sales pitching was fun. I imagine it’s what proselytizing Christians feel like. Here I am with something that I think is a shame you haven’t been introduced to, and it’s my duty to bring people something that will enrich their lives. Well, sort of. I mean, zombie fetuses aren’t exactly everlasting paradise, but you get the idea.

After a while, we all started experimenting with different methods of attracting customers. I even managed to stumble upon something that worked on the women that was 90% effective.

First I would make eye contact with my head slightly cocked, eyebrows up, and a “hey, what’s up smile.” Then I’d display my arms like Jesus at the Last Supper, only with my arms a little lower, as if to say, “Come here and check out this package.”

I’d get a smile back before my hands gave her the two pumps open and closed to say “come over here”. Somehow this got them to just walk over and listen to me. Why did I learn this black magic AFTER I’m married with 2 kids?

Then came the game began.

“Have you heard of Arsenic Lullaby?”

“No.”

“Are you a fan of Dark Humor?”

“Sometimes.”

“Really, well, we’ll see about that.”

I’d look into their eyes a slight squint as if I was actually trying to asses her before handing her one of the stock sample pages.

“Here, let me show you one page and if you like, I think you’ve found your new favorite book.”

They’d almost always laugh and I’d follow it up with the rest of the pitch. There wasn’t always a sale, but if there was no effort, then there wouldn’t even be the possibility of one.

Jonny “Bones” Jones is this event. He came into the UFC with an amazing amount of hype and has crushed everyone he’s been put up against. The only loss for Jones is due to a disqualification because, in his excited face smashing state, he connected with an illegal elbow that wasn’t even necessary to finishing his fight.

Every one of his fights has had a “Holy Shit!” moment and I’d expect this one to be no different.

If you’re not a fan of the sport, but still don’t mind watching the more exciting fights, tune into the main event of this thing on VS this Sunday.

Steve: 202 - 137 (42 perfect picks)

Josh: 186 - 153 (49 perfect picks)

Jon Jones vs Vladimir Matyushenko

Steve: Jon Jones 1^st KO– Jones has been on a tear lately, beating all comers.  Bonnar, Hamill, Vera… all fell to this newcomer.  Matyushenko does not have the boxing of Bonnar, the wrestling of Hamill or the Muay Tai of Vera… this should be a quick, dirty nasty victory.

Josh: Jon Jones has to be the most exciting up and comer in the UFC. He is amazingly explosive, unorthodox, and has the build to that makes him difficult to get to. Matyushenko has a wealth of experience, but that only means something to me if he’s fighting anyone other than Jones. Jon Jones by 1^st round KO.

Mark Munoz vs Yushin Okami

Josh: Yushin Okami by decision. Okami is a huge step up in competition for Munoz. Mark’s been on a tear, but I think Okami puts a stop to it. This should be a battle.

Steve: Okami 3rd submission– Munoz has been doing some good things in the octogan. Okami, however is too strong and smothering to be taken out by him. Okami is one of the best in the weight class, and he will show it tonight.

John Howard vs Jake Ellenberger

Steve: Howard, decision– this is one of the more even fights in my mind, which is why I took it to decision.  It really could be a toss up.

Josh: Tough call. I don’t want to look like we’re just agreeing on everything, but I’ll give it to Howard by decision as well.

Tyson Griffin vs Takanori Gomi

Josh: Gomi by decision. I think he’s looking to show that he’s still a force and will win this with sheer grit.

Steve: Griffin by decision– Griffin can beat just about anyone in the lightweight division… but he just doesn’t finish fights.  Gomi is still a solid fighter, but he has fallen from the ranks of the elite to one of middling performances.

Paul Kelly vs Jacob Volkmann

Steve: Paul Kelly 2^nd KO– I like Paul Kelly.  He is one of those “Battlin’ Brits” I like watching.  Volkmann needs to show me much more for me to put money on him.

Josh: Paul Kelly has the better record. I’ll give it to him by decision.

DaMarques Johnson vs Matthew Riddle

Josh: I don’t really care for Matt Riddle, so I’m picking DaMarques Johnson out of spite. Pure ugly spite. Johnson by KO in the 2^nd.

Steve: Matt Riddle, decision– DaMarques likes to swing for the fences and that style has worked for him in the past.  Riddle is a solid ground and pounder who should smother this to a victory.

James Irvin vs Igor Pokrajac

Steve: Irvin 1^st KO. Irvin hasn’t looked good since Anderson Silva made him look like a chump.  This may be his last ditch effort to stay in the UFC.  Back to 205 after looking like a corpse at 185.  He should make this an exciting match.

Josh: James Irvin is a guy the UFC likes and I think they’re setting him up for a win. Irvin by KO in the 1^st.

Brian Stann vs Mike Massenzio

Josh: Stann by KO in the 1^st. I’m watching Futurama and I don’t care to explain.

Steve: Stann 3rd KO. Stann is not the most impressive fighter out there.  He is slow and stiff and doesn’t have the flashy KOs or subs.  But, he has a good story, was a champ in the WEC and has enough skills to finish off Massenzio, if not in a flashy way.

Darren Elkins vs Charles Oliveira

Steve: Oliveira 1st submission. Oliveira is a solid fighter looking to make an impression.  He hasn’t lost and won’t be beat by Elkins.

Josh: Elkins by KO in the 1^st. He did it to Duane Ludwig, why not again?

Rob Kimmons vs Steve Steinbeiss

Josh: Kimmons by submission in the 1^st. His record shows a pattern of this being a win for him. It’d be a shame for that to be messed up.

Steve: Kimmons 2^nd sub. Steinbeiss hasn’t looked too solid and though they both lost their last fight, Kimmons has the experience to pull off the victory.

I don’t know how to describe San Diego ComicCon other than madness.

The first thing I would tell you is that it isn’t just about comic books. It’s more of a multimedia expo. Movie studios were promoting their new titles next to video game developers. Television networks, toy makers, publishers, special effects artists, comic artists, borderline pornographers, actual pornographers, internet companies, and even guys that made lampshades were all there selling something. If you like entertainment, there is something there for you.

I loved having an exhibitor badge because it let me walk around before the madness started. I’d be lying if I’d told you I wasn’t just a little bit overwhelmed. More than once I was wowed by someone’s booth. There’s something about seeing life sized Iron Man suits all lit up that brings out the kid in me. The Capcom booth brought on a flood of memories from Mega Man to Street Fighter and many other of my favorite games, I wanted to cry when I saw their display.

I also had to wonder, was it worth it to some of these companies? Some of these booths were wildly expensive, but they were mostly promoting things the convention goers already were aware of. It seemed like some big pissing contest for the big boys there.

Walking around seeing everything, I kind of wished I’d brought my son. He’d love this stuff. Then the doors opened and that all changed.

Thousands of people packed in and wow, was it difficult to get my head wrapped around it all. Just trying to move among the mass of people was almost an impossible task. Any time I did walk around, within minutes I was craving the safety of the Arsenic Lullaby booth. “I’ll sell stuff, just get me out of here!”

Time didn’t move the same either during the whole event. We’d take breaks from the booth from time to time so we didn’t get burnt out. Every time, with out fail, we’d come back saying how we felt like hours had past when it’d only been 30 minutes. If you’re dying, definitely go to this thing. You’ll feel like you’ve experienced another life time before you leave.

Then there’s the costumed people. You may have seen photos. Some were amazingly creative. Some were very well done. Some were just plain awful. But really, what gets the guys going? The cosplay girls, right?

Forget it. Sure, there was a Wonder Woman there who I couldn’t help but stare at, but for the most part, the masquerading attendees weren’t very attractive. The key was, they’d accentuate the finer points, but upon closer inspection, you’d be disappointed.

“Whoa, check out Hawk Girl’s rack…hey wait a minute…are those stretch marks?”

Even the non-booth babes who did pull off their costume had some an air of weirdness about them. I could picture them 40 years from now, attending the show, in the same costume only the ravages of time and gravity have taken their effect.

“Every year I dress up as Poison Ivy. It’s a tradition. Oh, how the boys loved it. They’d take pictures of me you know. Of course, I used to care a little more back then. I’d trim the shrub a little better back then. This year I think I’ll dye it green, ya know to match the outfit. Not the whole thing, mind you. Just the bits that stick out. It’s easier that way.”

By the end of the weekend though, it didn’t matter. Oh, look another Hunter Thompson. Buy a book!

Now that I’ve had some time to relax, I’d like to share some thoughts on my experience with San Diego Comic Con and working with Arsenic Lullaby. Over the next few days, I’ll have a post about some aspect of my experience there. Today is just about the setting: San Diego.

I didn’t see much of San Diego, but what I did see was nice. The ride from the airport was pleasant because it goes thru the harbor area where ships ranging from the battle variety to pirate are docked. I’d love to spend a day there, but I didn’t think far enough ahead to consider a decompress day to sight see.

The area I spent most of my time was just like any other city. Standards like Kinko’s and 7-11 along side local hot spots that each have their own personality. One thing I didn’t see but was looking for was a medical marijuana dispensary. You can’t buy anything with out a valid “prescription”, which didn’t matter to me. I just wanted to see what it looked like and maybe ask a few questions like, “Aw come on man, can’t I just buy some anyway?”

What was nice was the city really embraced the Comic Con community. Banners were hung everywhere. Some of the businesses leased out their space for promotion; “Is that store called Cartoon Network Pizza?”. Even the signs for the trolly station were in Klingon.

Yes, Klingon!

Like many of the people at the Con, I am not from San Diego. I had no idea what those signs said the normal 51 weeks a year. Having signs in Klingon probably would not be so bad for the locals because they know what the hell they’re looking at. The worst part was, not being a Star Trek fan, I had no idea that was Klingon. I’m asking any Asian or Arab I could find what the hell “Klaptoo ka ahk” meant before I found out what was going on.

Second, while this was going on, less than 200 miles away is Arizona. As most of you know, Arizona is at center stage for it’s law attempting to do something about the illegal immigrant (Mexican) population. Meanwhile, San Diego is openly welcoming people from another fucking planet that doesn’t even exist. How’s that for bizarre?

I’d love to go back and take some time to explore. As it was, I had little more than thirty minute breaks to gather my sanity before going back to the booth to hock more comic books. Next time, San Diego. Next time.

Other than UFC predictions, I haven’t written much lately. Sorry. Most of my friends who read my blog tend to not care about MMA, so as far as they’re concerned, I haven’t been writing anything for a very long time.

I’ve had a lot of things on my mind, most of which are things that I don’t want to air out in a public forum. I’ve had a lot of changes happen in a short span of time and it’s been a challenge to deal with creatively. Once I find balance, I plan to return to my normal writing schedule. I really do.

Anyway, to something stupid…

I took my son to the community pool the other day. While we swimming, three high school boys (that sounds creepy) showed up. It wasn’t a big deal, they were actually pretty decent in that they weren’t causing any problems or being obnoxious. They were just enjoying the pool, staying in the lap land while my son and I were in the shallow end.

At one point, they decided to see who could swim the farthest underwater. One would take a deep breath, jump in and struggle to get as far as he could. He’d come up and say “Beat that!” as he’s gasping for air.

The kid who’d won went the entire length of the pool. When he came up, he was both proud and surprised that he’d made it that far. The other two didn’t have a hope of even matching his distance but they still tried.

As this went on, I found myself wanting to join in. Not because it looked fun but because I’d completely kick their asses and I wanted them to know it.

It was so hard for me to fight the urge to show them up. I also wanted to be condescending about it. I pictured myself rolling my eyes before I out swam them, then offer some tips as to how they could improve.

It was a strange feeling and I have no idea why it was happening. I didn’t care about them or what they thought of me seeing as I’d likely never see them again. There were no women around to try and impress. My son isn’t old enough to grasp just how awesome his old man is. So what was going on?

The only thing I can think of is it’s some primitive instinct. Deep within my subconscious, an ape ancestor decided to show up and let these young chimps know they’ve still got a ways to go.

(Just so you know, I’m not being racist by calling them “chimps” . These boys were white, but you probably knew that because they were swimming.)

What ever it was, I was able to keep the urge suppressed. As soon as they left, I immediately went to the lap lane and doubled the kid’s “record”. Catching my breath, I thought back to the times where an adult had competitively embarrassed me for no reason and thought, “ah, that’s what it was about.”