I’m getting sick of researchers.

I read this article the other day about how people are giving their babies more unusual names. I’d agree with that seeing as my wife and I have chosen to go with “unusual” baby names and several other parents we know have done the same. Because I noticed that, I guess I should get a lab coat and call myself a researcher.

Now comes the inserting of opinion into an otherwise unimportant story to make it sensational. All the researchers really found is unusual baby names are on the rise. Since that’s not exciting enough, the researcher here suggest that it’s a sign that we are becoming more narcissistic.

What’s the evidence? Oh, you don’t have any. Weird, so I suppose you shouldn’t insert opinion into research then?

My wife and I both have two of the most common names ourselves and we (I sort of pushed for it, but she agreed) wanted to give our kids names that did stand out. It’s not out of narcissism like this article suggests though. It’s because I know how much I hate hearing someone saying “Josh! Josh!” and I turn around only to see it’s some mother calling her child. When you have a top five name, it happens all the time.

Knowing when people are talking to you and an inflated ego are two different things.

Now I’d like to address the researcher here, Twenge. What a weird name, “Twenge”.

I know that you chose a boring thing to research, who’s fault is that? Do you have to take your boring topic and spin it? Is that just what you’re taught in school?

Remember, no one cares about the results of a boring study. So go with an attention grabber like, “Researchers suggest trimming toenails too short means you’re an asshole!” That gets you grant money.

In the article, Twenge says, “There’s been this cultural shift toward focusing on the individual, toward standing out and being unique as opposed to fitting in with the group and following the rules.”

Cultural shift? I think I remember “just one person can make a difference” type stuff all of my life. In fact, the power and importance of the individual is one of the principles this country was founded on. It’s the entrepreneurial spirit.

Standing out is what made Jeff Bezos start Amazon. Believing you can be unique is why Brad Pitt is an actor. Not being a part of the collective is why Chuck Liddell can be wealthy from punching people in the face.

Believing that you can be special and you can make your own path used to be seen as a good quality, not narcissism.

“It remains to be seen whether having a unique name necessarily leads to narcissism later in life,” Twenge said. “If that unique name is part of a parent’s overall philosophy that their child is special and needs to stand out and that fitting in is a bad thing, then that could lead to those personality traits.”

I’m guessing, and this is just me using my brain, which is something that is foreign to researchers, that it’s the parenting of these kids that leads to any narcissistic tendencies. Perhaps the parent who gives their little on an odd name are also the kind of parent who’ll make parenting decisions that can lead to a bad attitude or narcissism.

It’s not that the kid is named Flipflop that is the problem. It’s the parent that asks the teachers:

Why are you failing Flipflop.

Because he is lazy and doesn’t turn in his assignments.

Nuh-uh, not my Flipflop.

Maybe if you helped him with his homework…

Oh no you do not tell me how to raise my child!

Of course, it’s possible I’m being defensive about the choices in naming my children. ‘Cause you do not tell me how to raise my child. No you do not. *snap-snap-head sway*

Sure, helmet laws might be pushing the boundaries of the safety police, but they’re just protecting children. It’s the same as the laws that require car seats for ever increasingly larger children. I mean, I don’t think fourteen year olds need a car seat, but what about the twelve year olds? Shouldn’t they be protected?

You’re just being silly now.

Yes, it’s silly, but I’m willing to bet when my sons have kids, they’ll have to wear helmets in the car and stay in a protective cocoon until they have licenses to drive themselves.

It seems crazy to suggest such a thing but it happens. It happens in small steps. Someone suggests that hot dogs should be redesigned because they’re a choking hazard, everyone laughs except the few loud concerned parents (special interests) and we wind up with some wacky frankfurters at the ballparks.

Now you’re just being paranoid. No one would ever suggest…

Pediatricians Call for a Choke-Proof Hot Dogs.

Oh. I guess I do live in Wacky World.

Yes, my friends, the hot dog, a sausage that can be traced back to the 1480s is dangerous.

If we lump the dog in with the sausage itself, the first sausages were made around 589 BC. How did we make it 2,600 years with to become an advanced society?

If it was so dangerous, shouldn’t we have all pretty much choked to death?

“The best way to protect kids is to design these risks out of existence.”

Yes, let’s redesign everything. Buttons, that’s perfect to choke on. Pennies, that too, let’s redesign those. Small balls, choking hazard, change ‘em.

You want to redesign the hot dog? It’s pretty easy. CHEW IT! That changes the size and shape pretty significantly.

The world is full of choking hazards. When I was a young kid, I almost choked on a jingle bell around Christmas time. I was tossing it in the air and trying to catch it in my mouth like cool guys do with grapes or popcorn. Well, I succeeded and it kind of lodged in and I couldn’t get it out.

I had trouble getting it out, so genius me, I though, maybe I could push it down. You know lodge it into my lung so I could breath again. The reasoning was stupid, but somehow it made me gag-cough and it came out. I didn’t think, “That needs to be made differently.” I learned a lesson that day: Don’t that, stupid!

I doubt we’ll see square throat pegs in the near future, but don’t be surprised if your hotdogs come with a label warning you that you can indeed choke on something.

We bought my son a bike last week and a helmet along with it. I asked if he really needed the helmet seeing as when he’s on the bike his head only an inch or two higher than normal.

Yes, he does.

It’s got training wheels, so he shouldn’t be whipping violently towards the ground from the side after making too sharp of a turn on loose gravel.

He’s needs to have a helmet.

I doubt he’ll be popping wheelies hard enough to flip backwards.

He has to have one.

Nor will he be pedaling fast enough to go flying over the handlebars. If he does crash into something, he’ll probably be going just fast enough to smash his front teeth in on the bar.

It doesn’t matter. He has to wear a helmet.

Why? Why does he need a helmet?

It’s the law.

What? When did that happen?

First, there doesn’t need to be a law for children to put helmets on. The smart kids will wear helmets. The athletic kids will learn to ride well with out them. The average kids will be fine and the disasters will get weeded out.

Making helmets mandatory gets the way of evolution. You know evolution, right? It’s that thing people keep saying is so important to teach, but we NEVER seem to want to apply it to anything.

Second, by making helmet laws and other safety laws apply to children, we’re basically conditioning the children to give up their freedoms of choice because the government says so.

“Children don’t have freedom to choose. It’s up to the parents to…”

Ah, exactly. When parents say “Because I said so,” children think that one day, when they’re an adult, they can choose otherwise. When parents say “because it’s the law,” it doesn’t matter when they become adults, they still won’t have a choice, so they might as well accept it.

I’m not saying that helmets aren’t a good idea, I just want to choose whether or not my son’s head is vulnerable to being cracked open like an egg.

This over protectiveness of children isn’t healthy and it’s getting ridiculous. How ridiculous? That’s for tomorrow.

I may be the only person in the world, but I am not a fan of the website People Of Walmart. Yeah, I know, it’s a super popular website that pokes fun at all of those weirdoes at America’s most popular retailer, but I just can’t get into it. It’s not like I don’t enjoy laughing at people, one of the sites I enjoy is Look at This Fucking Hipster or latfh.com, but to me there’s a difference.

Compared to latfh.com, People of Walmart comes off as elitist snobbery to me. We’re constantly bombarded by the messages of “do what makes you happy” or “just be yourself” and “who cares what people think?”. Well, it seems that what’s left out is “as long as we all agree that what makes you happy is approved by the collective, you’re acceptably different.”

The hipsters on latfh.com are mockable because they are trying too hard to be different. They make decisions about what will make them stand out. They spend time on trying to be the ironic funny guy that people think is a quirky genius. They want to look like the don’t care.

The people who are being photographed Walmart just are different. They get up in the morning and throw on what they want with out any thought at all. They don’t waste time on what what image their putting out or what other people will think. They genuinely don’t care.

To me, the people you see on that site are being themselves with out a thought to what other people think. Sure they may bizarre. Yes, they are sometimes disgusting. I’m even willing to bet that a few may be borderline insane. They’re also some of the most genuine individuals you’ll see. Isn’t that something we’ve been taught as children to embrace?

This looks like a solid fight card. Two have title implications. There’s a  few up & comers looking to take down an established opponent to show they belong in the upper echelon of the UFC. If you’re a fight fan, you should definitely check this one out.

Steve: 138 - 94 (32 perfect picks)

Josh: 134 - 98 (37 perfect picks)

Minotauro Nogueira vs Cain Velasquez

Steve: I think this is one of the toughest fights to call.  Velasquez is definitely a solid fighter and possibly the future of the division.  But Nogueira has looked great in virtually every fight he has had, aside from Frank Mir.  Cain showed that he can tire out as he did in his fight with Kongo… I see Nogueira wearing him out and getting the 3^rd round submission.

Josh: When Nogueira fought Mir, he looked like crap. I’d written him off to being too battle weary. Then I find out he was coming off of an illness and he looked amazingly solid against Randy Couture. So what do I take out of that? Noguiera is still a force to be reckoned with. Valasquez is good, but he’s not ready. Noguiera by 2^nd round submission.

Wanderlei Silva vs. Michael Bisping

Josh: Bisping has been impressive, but he hasn’t fought a maniac like Silva. I think Silva overwhelms Bisping quickly and wins this in the 1^st round by KO.

Steve: Wanderlei may not have won many fights lately, but he is still on a level above the stick and move Bisping.  Don’t get me wrong, I have always thought Bisping was a good fighter… he just isn’t on Silva’s level.  Silva, by decision.

Joe Stevenson vs. George Sotiropoulos

Steve: Sotiropoulis is a good fighter, but just hasn’t fought on the same level as the well rounded Joe Stephenson.  I see Joe Daddy winning in a 2^nd round submission.

Josh: This one’s a tough call for me. Sotiropoulos is a tough fighter and he’s been on a tear while Joe Stevenson hasn’t had much luck his last couple times out. I think this is a big fight for George and he may psyche himself out allowing Stevenson to win by decision.

Keith Jardine vs. Ryan Bader

Josh: Bader is a BMF with an undefeated record. Jardine is awkward and is susceptible to being overwhelmed early on. I think Bader is ready to step up to be big leagues. Bader by 1^st round TKO.

Steve: Keith Jardine vs Ryan Bader could be the most interesting fight of the night.  I think Bader is a well rounded fighter, but Jardine has gone the distance with the best in the world and has only lost to the best strikers around… Thiago Silva, Wanderlei Silva, Houston Alexander.  Bader doesn’t possess that kind of power.  Jardine, 3rd decision.

Mirko Cro Cop vs. Anthony Perosh

Steve: Crocop has not looked good lately, even in victory.  I think if Rothwell takes this, it is time for him to retire.  That being said, I am looking for a first round Crocop KO.  edit… for some reason, Rothwell is out?  I still go Crocop.

Josh: Last minute replacement against one of the most dangerous kickers in the world. How do you think this’ll work out? Crocop by KO in the 1^st.

Stephan Bonnar vs. Krzysztof Soszynski

Josh: This is do or die for Bonnar. I really hope he pulls this out. I’m rooting for Bonnar by decision.

Steve: I really like Bonnar.  I do.  But his last two fights he got manhandled by wrestlers.  So, who is up against now?  A solid wrestler.  You gotta go with The Polish Experiment, decision.

Chris Lytle vs. Brian Foster

Steve: Fight of the night!  Lytle vs Foster!  I hope they show this one.  I love whenever Lytle fights, but I think this time, he has his hands full.  Foster, by decision.

Josh: I’ll just pick the opposite of Steve and say Lytle by decision.

CB Dollaway vs. Goran Reljic

Josh: CB is a tough guy and fights well, but he’s had some stumbles. Goran might be in to upset CB. Goran by submission in the 1^st.

Steve: The old Goran would manhandle Dollaway… but after his back surgery, he just isn’t the same fighter.  I am going to guess Dollaway 2^nd submission.

James Te Huna vs. Igor Pokrajac

Steve: I really don’t know Ta Huna… but Pokrajic is a training partner of CroCop… which tells me… he will lose.  Ta Huna, 2^nd KO.

Josh: I actually like Seve’s logic on this. Ta Huna by 2^nd round submission.

I’ve never liked the term “overweight” because weight doesn’t mean anything. If I took a man who weighs 900 pounds and flew to the moon where I’d be 150 pounds, is he suddenly healthier? Clearly not. It would seem obvious to anyone who has eyes that weight is not an solid indicator of health. So why has the number on the scale been so worshiped?

Depending on who you listen to, somewhere between 1/3 and 99.99% of the American population is overweight. It would seem having that many people concerned over their eating and exercising is not enough. Enter the new term “Normal Weight Obesity”.

Now, I’d like to think researchers at the Mayo Clinic actually used their eyes in conjunction with their brain and decided that how much you weigh may not be an accurate measure of your obesity level. Sadly, they needed a study to tell them that.

When Scales Lie: Normal Weight but Still at Risk?

Shouldn’t this be titled “When Diet Researchers Lie” or “Doctors Can Think”?

“As many as 30 million Americans who are considered average weight may actually have what scientists call normal weight obesity, according to a recent study by the Mayo Clinic.”

Yes, but what the article doesn’t state is how many Americans are overweight but not even pudgy. Just about any man (or woman) who isn’t frail is at least overweight according to BMI. Tom Cruise and Michael Jordan would be classified as obese. Does this sound right to you? Of course not.

Many many people in the fitness community have been saying this for a very long time. It’s stunning to me how these researches have finally made this shocking discovery.

If these people took this long just to figure out that your weight can be “normal” but still be over fat, how can we trust them for diet and exercise advice? People in lab coats are not as brilliant as we’d like to think.

The mirror and how your clothes fit are your best measures.

I love this, in the article there’s a link that says “Are you a healthy weight? Click here to measure your body mass index.” Isn’t this entire article about how weight/height or BMI isn’t an accurate measure of health?

When I first heard of it, I was very excited about Google Wave. What got me was the way it was introduced. The Google rep posed the question, “What if e-mail were invented now, what would it look like?”

It’s an interesting question and their answer, Wave, was a good one. I can’t describe it accurately enough, but the closest I can come is to say it’s a combination of e-mail, wiki, chat and some other stuff. It’s really a great idea.

After watching the video, I was excited. The collaborative potential thing this has is thru the roof. I WANT Wave!

What? I have to get an invite? Damn it! That could take a year.

Well, it didn’t take a year. In fact, I somehow managed to get one from my Mom who somehow managed to get it from someone.

Great, now I’m on Google Wave. No one uses it.

I’ve got a dozen friends who should love this thing and only one even checks the damn thing.

I think I know why. We already have an internet infrastructure set up. We already have e-mail. We already have wikis. We already have instant messaging. Wave is not wildly different enough to get us to switch, or even remember it exists.

In my opinion, it is an amazingly good idea with tremendous potential, but because no one’s using it, it’ll just remain potential.

I bet this is how it feels to be excited about some sort of hydrogen powered car with out a filling station to fuel up.

Supposedly there’s some big sports event this weekend. I’m guessing that event would be tomorrow night’s UFC: 109. After all, who isn’t interested in seeing 46 year old Randy Couture take on 45 year old Mark Coleman?

If you’re not interested, you are either not a fan of the sport itself or you don’t know you’re history.

These two guys are two of the most important figures in UFC history. Both have not only been champions but they’ve actually influenced major portions of how the men who step into the cage fight.

It’s not like these two guys are in wheelchairs. Yes, they are past their prime, but they are still strong in their areas of expertiese. They still have the passion to win. The only difference is, they’re both smarter fighters than they were when this match was supposed to happen 10 years ago.

I can’t wait for this one.

Oh, yeah, the rest of the card looks pretty good too.

Steve: 135 - 86 (32 perfect picks)

Josh: 127 - 94 (35 perfect picks)

Randy Couture vs Mark Coleman

Steve: I hate this fight!  Two of my all time favorite fighters.  This is really tough.  If it goes to decision, judges seem to always favor Couture. Randy has better conditioning, better gamesmanship, more well rounded. They both have great heart. Coleman is a better wrestler and is definitely stronger. Coleman finishes most of his fights, Randy does not. I hate this.  But I am going to go for the underdog, and go Coleman, 3rd KO.

Josh: Really? Coleman has better wrestling? I’ll give Coleman the advantage in the strength department. That’ll help for the first round of the fight, then Coleman will be completely gassed and Randy’s superior conditioning will steer him to the victory. I see this fight going to a decision and ending with Randy’s hand raised.

Nate Marquardt vs Chael Sonnen

Josh: Nate Marquardt is one of those guys that I’ve overlooked until his last few fights. The man is just a dominant fighter. I think he’s way to much or Chael to handle. Marquardt gets the decision.

Steve: Chael is a good wrestler… but not as good as Nate.  And with his size, power, submission and now knock out advantage, I don’t see Chael having a chance.  Nate, 2^nd KO.

Mike Swick vs Paulo Thiago

Steve: Thiago has never been that impressive. His knock out of Josh Koscheck was a fluke. I see Swick making a return to old form… I see Mike “Quick” Swick KO in the 1^st. He needs to bounce back to the contender’s section.

Josh: This one’s tough for me. Maybe it’s because I’m buying into the Thiago hype; maybe it’s because I never bought into the Swick hype. Either way, this is a tough call for me. I’ll go against my instinct and say Swick overwhelms Thiago with a KO in the 1^st.

Demian Maia vs Dan Miller

Josh: This is tough. I have a couple friends who train with the Miller brothers and they’re always talking up how great those guys are. I’d love to side with them every time, but Maia is on a level when it comes to submissions that few have even seen. Demian Maia with a 2^nd round submission.

Steve: This is an intriguing match up… wrestler vs jui-jitsu master.  I see Maia winning this one via 2^nd submission.

Matt Serra vs Frank Trigg

Steve: Another intriguing match up.  Serra is close to retirement, Trigg wants a comeback.  In theory, Serra is better in all aspects aside from wrestling, but I really think Trigg needs this, and he will fight to the end.  Trigg, by decision.

Josh: In my opinion, Matt Serra beat Matt Hughes. He also had a pretty good showing against GSP considering how tough GSP really is. I think Serra is one of those guys that people will never give enough credit to. I’m picking Matt via 2^nd round RNC submission.

Mac Danzig vs Justin Buchholz

Josh: Danzig bores me and he’ll probably bore me again as he grinds his way to a decision win. Don’t get me wrong, he’d completely kick my ass in a fight, but I’d probably yawn half way thru it.

Steve: Mac has definitely been the biggest bust in TUF winners.  He has lost so many of his recent fights, I believe the UFC is giving him whoever they think he can beat.  Mac, 2^nd submission.

Melvin Guillard vs Ronys Torres

Steve: Melvin is a solid performer, but it all depends on which Melvin shows up.  If his heart is in it, he will win just about every time. Guillard, 2^nd sub.

Josh: I’ve never been impressed by Melvin Guillard. He’s fun to watch, but I enjoy it even more when he’s tapping out. I’m thinking he’ll be tapping from a RNC by Torres in the 1^st.

Phillip Nover vs Rob Emerson

Josh: Yeah…Torres’s record idn’t so good. I’m going to have to pick Emerson by…some well placed punches. TKO. 2^nd.

Steve: Nover needs to get back on track and Emerson is just the type of guy who will give him a reasonable test without overwhelming him. Nover, 2^nd submission

Brian Stann vs Phil Davis

Steve: I really don’t know Phil Davis.  Stann is a slow and plodding ex-Marine who does an adequate job but never really impresses.  I give it to Stann, decision.

Josh: Phil Davis by surprise TKO in the 1^st. Why? I have no idea who the hell this guy is, but he looks like the kind of guy who would do that.

Tim Hague vs Chris Tuchsherer

Josh: Haven’t seen much from Tuchsherer. His only fight in the UFC was a losst to Gonzaga. Tough to gauge from that.  I say Tuchsherer by decision. I realize that’s risky, but accept full responsibility.

Steve: This is a fight that could go either way.  Hague is the guy who was destroyed by Todd Duffee in the record breaking fastest KO in UFC history.  I believe if he gets beat, he will be out of the UFC. Because of that, I will give it to him, by decision.

Mustapha Al Turk vs Rolles Gracie

Steve: Rumor is, Mustapha is out.  Regardless, how can you go against a Gracie returning to the Octagon… especially one in the Heavyweight division?  Rolles Gracie, 3^rd submission.

Josh: How could I not pick Rolles Gracie? How could I not pick him to win by submission in the 1^st? What kind of Jiu Jitsu guy would I be if I said any different?

As many of my friends and family know, I’m not a huge fan of President Obama. He seems like a decent person, a brilliant politician, and someone who wants to grow the size and reach of government well beyond our current level. To me, the current level is unacceptably large to a people who want to call themselves free.

But that’s now what this is about. I’m here to defend this guy today.

The President was giving a speech in which he said:

“This isn’t how responsible families do their budgets. When times are tough, you tighten your belts. You don’t go buying a boat when you can barely pay your mortgage. You don’t blow a bunch of cash on Vegas when you’re trying to save for college. You prioritize. You make tough choices. And it’s time your government did the same.”

Then the Sean Hannitys and the mayor of Las Vegas responded with something like, “Ohhh, does the President have it out for Las Vegas? He must hate Las Vegas? I guess he doesn’t care about the people of Las Vegas!”

Stop!

Where was he wrong? If you’re trying to be responsible with your money, Sean, would you take a trip to Vegas? Of course not.

Las Vegas is almost a generic term for a place where you toss money into a hole for fun. “Las Vegas” as the President used it, at least to me, would also include Reno, Atlantic City, any riverboat casino, and even non gambling destinations like Disney World. When you’re trying save for college, you don’t “blow a bunch of cash” in these places.

It’s nitpicky garbage like this that make some of these people intolerable. Guys like Hannity do make good points, but when they attack every little thing for the sake of attacking, it takes some of the validity away from the more serious issues.

Now to the mayor’s complaining about how comments like these damage tourism. It’s not one line in the President’s speech that’s hurting Vegas, it’s the people tightening up their budgets, and you just don’t fit. He should stop complaining and start working to figure out a way for his city to prosper in an economy that doesn’t support the uninhibited spending of money that Vegas currently thrives on.

On the smaller side, White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel got into hot water when he privately called a group of liberal activists “fucking retarded.”

I’m sorry, what’s the problem? Sounds like an accurate description to me.

I’ve done this before, so let me do it again quickly, “retarded” is a word with a meaning. Here, here it is:

slow or limited in intellectual or emotional development or academic progress

There’s a difference between calling someone “retarded” and calling them a “retard”. Just because some people get offended at the word “retarded” doesn’t make the word itself bad enough to refer to as “the r-word”. If used properly, it’s perfectly valid.

I’m short, I don’t like being called “short”. In some instances, such as needing to get things off of top shelf, being sort is somewhat of a disability. Maybe I’ll look to ban “the s-word”.

Everyone has tips on how to lose weight. Sometimes it’s good advice, but usually they’re just things that sound like good ideas until you give them a half moment’s worth of thought.

This article is about 50/50 when it comes to advice. 50% ho-hum who cares tips and 50% garbage.

Quit the clean plate club. One in four Americans eat everything they’re served no matter how big the portions, surveys reveal. A better strategy: Eat a healthy portion, then stop. It’s better to waste a little food (and save it for tomorrow) than to overload your body.

Oh yeah, I don’t have to eat EVERYTHING on my plate. If just stopping was so easy, then why do I need this tip? If only I had a built in signal from my stomach to my brain that tells me when I’m done eating. Oh, wait, I do. I don’t listen to that, so why would I listen to you?

Besides, don’t you know there are starving children in *insert country* that would just love to have that food?

Never eat directly out of the bag, box, or carton. Put the portion on the plate right away and put the package away, then sit down and enjoy.

You JUST said that we’re inclined to eat everything on the plate anyway, so what difference does it make if I eat everything in the bag or pour the bag onto a plate and eat everything that way? Is it just because I’m using a few extra calories to grab the plate?

Like big portions? Do this. Overload your plate with vegetables or salad with a smidgen of dressing or have a big, steaming bowl of broth-based soup. These water-rich, low-fat foods are so low in calories that a big portion isn’t a problem.

If I liked vegetables that much, I probably wouldn’t need these tips. I think it’s the way asparagus makes me gag that steers me towards the extra slice of pizza. To get the horrendous taste out of my mouth.

Use a salad plate as your dinner plate. Less real estate means automatic portion control.

Why stop at a salad plate? Why not use a bread & butter plate? That’s a super small portion. Maybe you could even use a child’s play set sized tea saucer and wind up thinking that ritz cracker sandwich is just too much to finish.

Tricking myself doesn’t work. Ever try to set your clock ahead 10 minutes so you’re early to stuff, but then just remember you always have an extra 10 minutes so you wind up just as late as you would have been had you not tried that little “life hack”? I’d eat the whole plate and think, “Hmmm, I didn’t actually eat a whole plate, so I could have more.”

Pack your leftovers before eating. Sure, it’s easy to put a healthy plate of food in front of you. The trouble comes when the plate empties and you have more of each food sitting in front of you in alluring serving bowls. The answer: Package and store leftovers before you sit down to eat. That way, getting seconds becomes a whole lot harder and feels more inappropriate.

Spoon onto plate, microwave for two minutes, eat. That does sound difficult. This might have been good advice back when you had to heat an oven and wait 30 minutes to reheat some food, but now?

By the way, who has alluring serving bowls? Do they have pictures of naked women on them? I don’t know what I’m talking about. I have titillating silverware.